It is nothing better than being honest with God, yourself and others.
I can’t hold up this front any longer.
Lately I’ve been feeling down and don’t know why.
I’ve been waking up every morning putting on this happy mask when deep down inside I want to die.
Depression is no joke and I’ve been dealing with this for a while in silent.
It started getting real bad this month when I started cutting myself.
Over the weekend I started drinking and I took some pills( BIG MISTAKE)
I just wanted to feel good for ONE NIGHT.
I’ve been wanting to commit suicide but when there was a chance I could actually lose my life I realized I DIDN’T WANT TO DIE!
Those pills had me feeling a way I never felt before and not in a good way, they didn’t make me feel as good as I thought they would.
When I finally came down from my high(Which lasted for three whole days) I started thinking, this isn’t the life I want.
Everyone handle certain situations differently. I’ve been through a lot and haven’t fully recovered (mentally).We all go through trials and tribulations but we must RISE ABOVE IT.
God keeps giving me chance after chance and I don’t deserve it. After all the crazy situations I put myself in I promise you I learned my lesson. GOD I HEAR YOU!
I will no longer use alcohol, drugs nor sex to cure my depression , I will seek professional help.
Depression will not win.
I will continue to strive to be the hardworking , loving woman that I know I can be, after all I have a little sister looking up to me I can’t afford to make anymore dumb decisions.
I HAVE A PURPOSE ON THIS EARTH AND IT WILL BE FULFILLED.